Weeekeeeeennndddd

Today I am taking half a day, which effectively means I finish in 30 MINUTES! GaaadZOOKS I'm happy! My office is like the 3rd Reich this week, so a weekend away in Simonstown couldn't be more welcome than a hamper of Freezos and Bubbly delivered to my doorstep. Mother rings me last night:

Mother: Are you alive?
Olive: No, I died on Tuesday. Didn't you see the obituary?
Mother: You've fallen off the map this week. Why haven't you returned any of my calls?
Olive: What, all 47 of them?!
Mother: Darling, I just worry when I don't hear from you.
Olive: I've been busy, Mum.
Mother: Busy with?
Olive: Would you like a play by play?
Mother: I just hope nothing is wrong. Have you got some food in your fridge?
Olive: If you count Hunters as food.
Mother: Are you becoming an alcoholic?
Olive: Define alcoholic?
Mother: Oh dear. I'm coming down...
Olive: Mum, it's just for the weekend away.
Mother: Away? Where?! Who is driving you?
Olive: An unhinged, unshaven, unemployed drug-addict on his motorbike. He's picking me up just after dark. Unfortunately he has no spare helmet, so I thought I'm just put a fruit bowl on my head.
Mother: WHAT?!?!
Olive: It's okay Mum, I'm driving with friends.
Mother: Make sure you eat vegetables. You need them for your weak little knees.
Olive: Yes, a piece of broccoli should fix that tendon right up. And a carrot might help it see in the dark!

Mother gave up at that point, made me promise to wear suncream and hung up the phone. Mothers. You got to love them.