Illness stay at bay, so I can dance the night away

I feel an evil niggling in my throat, and the beginnings of an impending cough. I did think my candle was looking a little fried both top and bottom after last week. But I refuse to have my wild'n'wacky weekend sabotaged by a bout of bacteria, and so purchased questionable-brown-coloured bottle of Vicks Acta Plus Cough Syrup, aka instant cough death. Tastes like nine-year-old insect-infused syrup blended with jagermeister and a dollop of bovril. Gagged at desk, but stomached it in light of tomorrow's festivities. Will be up at 7:30 sharp tomorrow, Bok shirt on and ready to smash a freezo/bubbly while the boys drool over the game. Jokes, I'm totally into it! And got my England scarf ready and waiting for Sunday's game. I've gone rugby mad. Have actually arranged all weekend plans this weekend around games ---> like, wherever I end up crashing after night out on Sat must have large TV, waffle maker and myprodol; and organised to go to freezo place at 8am tomorrow instead of usual (and preferred) 10:30am just so can watch the game...

Tonight at girls' dinner I was meant to be the Bacardi Mojito Mix + Ice Crusher Machine supplier chick, seeing as I won these two things at work last week. (When I say 'won' I mean that when my editor held up the bottle and kindly started asking who might want to... ... before she could even finish her sentence I let out some sort of rabid bark and legged it to her desk to snatch up the must-have alcoholic hamper before anyone else in the office even had the chance. Probably wasn't such a good idea right before my performance review. But at least they can see I'm quick off the mark and I go after my dreams.) Have had texts this morning: 'Olive! Can't wait for mojito night.' Shit. How do I inform them that the boys and I got sucked into phuza Thursday spirit last night and drained every last drop of tipple. What was meant to be a quiet eve, a single mojito with chorizo pasta dinner turned into pint glasses brimming with crushed ice and Bacardi mix heaven, showered in limes and mint resulting in sugar high and blurred vision. Came home bottleless. And senseless. As a gesture of apology will take along crusher and turn everyone's drinks into fabulous slush puppies.

Hope I'm still invited.

For some unknown reason I idiotically decided to put entire wardrobe in the wash. Now everything is soaked right before the weekend. And let's just say a tumble dryer is not on my list of affordable luxuries (that would consist of one Mac product a month, one item of clothing a year, leg waxes, and Champagne). So, if you see me wandering round the Cape in bell bottoms you could camp under (a gypsie-esque phase in first year I'd very much like to forget), and a top fashioned from a tea towel... you know why. Will be desperately trying to dry everything on my 5cm by 10cm heater for night out on the town tomorrow. Can prob fit one item per hour. I best start now.

"Don't leaf me behind!"

I heart rugby

Well, suffice it to say after 12.5 hours' sleep last night (yes, got into bed at 7:30. Next-door neighbour was just leaving for Caprice), I'm back in the game! Yesterday I was a non-entity. A waste of space. A lost cause. A sorry excuse for a human being. Plankton.

Now I feel totally immortal. Super Olive! ---> If I can come out the other end of that weekend even partially alive, I can take on anything! An earthquake, heartbreak, the plague... U send it my way, I'll knock it right outta the playing field!

Friday night, ended up snuggled sleepily under blankets on balcony ploughing through bottles of champagne with the girls, gorging on stale chips and conducting an indepth conversation on sex, death and finger nail buffing. From one extreme to the next: an hour later we were rocking out in the car to some eardrum-busting chest-vibrating rave tooons, on our way to HQ where we danced like fabulous morons to a tropical drum beat. Before I was dragged to Dreaded Deco I dived-bombed and hit the sack early in preparation for England's game against Argentina the following morning.

Awoke with HQ drum beat in head, mascara on pillow, still wearing sequined top, one high heel and a sock. Canned pineapple juice (from where I don't know) and half a rusk next to bed. Forced myself into shower then headed off to where else but Caturra to watch the game. Slumped over deliciously perfect freezocino and a crispy croissant layered with bacon, cheese and avocado, in front of large flatscreen, I soon realised I was the only England supporter in the room. Was not at all impressed by some of the rude comments on the new stylish 'charcoal' tops sported by the so-called "The Also Blacks"  –

• "Did the All Blacks shrink in the wash?"

• "The English are like that person who wears white to someone else's wedding"

Was most elated when England scored a try in the final 10 minutes and I leapt onto my chair woooowoooo-ing and cheering patriotically, teeming with revenge and spite. Silence ensued. 'Woo' I quipped again, to the tempestuous coffin-dodger sitting behind me in an Argetinian scarf. 'In your face!'

My friend stared at me, appalled.
Me: 'Sorry, I blacked out... I'm still drunk.'

I screamed so hard when we won that I choked on my croissant.

And so the day progressed – hangover slowly dwindling, we headed for the Biscuit Mill where we purchased a bottle of bubbly and sat with friends in the sunshine giggling childishly at the washed-up Safrican mystriants that flock to the Mill on a Saturday morn to stuff there faces with an array of nosh then wash down their hangovers with novice mohitos. Big, small, fat, thin, gay, straight, white, black, pink, blue, hairy, bald, human, inhuman... At 2 o'clock, tipsy and windburnt, we raced of to V&A, bought a ticket for the worst movie in the world... wait for it... Final Destination 5... IN 3D!!... and proceeded to watch blood, spikes, rolling eyeballs, gurgling and deaths for the remainder of the afternoon. After burger and beer at my all-time favourite Hudsons, popped home to prepare for romping razzle at Tiger with Vivi&Lola. Felt like letting loose – found shortest skirt and highest heels in cupboard and despite gale-force winds and a threatening 14 degrees, discarded my stockings and wrapped myself in a ski jacket to get from flat to car.

Sunday: up early for rugby. Head to Sotano kitted out in Springbok shirt, gold shoes and hangover. Feeling the after effects of two nights out, smashed eggs benedict, an extra bowl of hollandaise, my friend's leftover eggs benedict, a bowl of mushrooms, my sister's leftover fruit, a sausage, a hot chocolate, the rest of my friend's hot chocolate, a coke, a strawberry juice, an orange juice. Not sure it was the nerves during such a stressful match, or lack of nutrition thanks to bender weekend, but my appetite was bottomless. There was no off button. Needless to say I owed 2/3rds of the bill. Left relieved (Go Bokke!!!!!) and stuffed, and spent day melding with couch.

Fun week ahead. Stay toooooned!

Hazy, lazy and crazy daisies

Feel flat and lifeless. Like this guy. Direct result of an entire 5 minutes' sleep last night due to searing leg and butt pain (thanks to retarded knee rehab). Also yesterday's fleeting heatwave meant I had to open the windows. Learnt very quickly that Greenpoint is nothing like Mouille Point ----> tranquil echoes of ocean, seagulls and laughter. Was kept conscious till stupid o'clock by car alarms, engines, cat fights (literal and figurative), and of course next-door neighbour's high heels and her post-night-on-the-town fry-up. Considered joining her for some bacon round 4am. Am so stiff and sleep-deprived today could be suffering from a living form of rigamortis.

Last night was set to do a review of Roberto's Signature Restaurant – exquisite Portuguese spot nestled on the corner of Long and Hout. Lovely summery temperatures meant Vivi&Lola and I discarded stockings and braved [recently de-Wintered] bare legs, and arrived sporting pretty dresses and calf-impaling heels. So excited by the prospect of summer were we that we pretty much polished off an entire bottle of Simonsig before we'd even been handed a menu. Enjoyed an extravagant feast of lobster thermidor and champagne and chatted late into the night about topiary trees, Christian Louboutins, and the mysteries that hail from Brakpan.

On an exciting note, it's Rugby World Cup Eve!! I shall hang up my rugby boot (takkie) tonight by the fireplace place (heater) and hope to find some biltong and beer (Hunter's Dry) in there in the morning...